So atm I’m dating this girl, and tbh idk if I want to be. By the time I next post a /personal/ post or whatever I probably won't be, which is why I hate writing personal posts and shit, but whatever.
I can’t stand relationships, especially when I don’t feel like I actually have strong feelings for that person. I enjoy like going to parties with her and getting drunk and doing stuff but like, idk, I feel like that’s it. I mean I know it’s not cuz we text every day and I think that’s good too, like I get on with her well, but she feels more like a friend than a girlfriend. And she asked me out when I was drunk so of course I thought it was a great idea to say yes but now I just feel awkward. For a start she lives in essex which is ridiculously far and I’m not bothered.
I know I need to talk to her about this but I just don’t know how, so far all I’ve done is like, not reply as much to her texts and just avoided talking about everything, idek. I’m a terrible person ahah.
I’m just worried because the last couple relationships I’ve been in I’ve felt this way and I’ve ended up absolutely hating the person. Normally I wouldn’t have but because I didn’t like them and we were dating it made me feel terrible and that dislike just grew and grew until I couldn’t stand them at all. I don’t want that to happen with her. I don’t want it to happen with anybody really, I hate when it does.
Urgh, it’s making me feel absolutely shit.